Starting From Scratch

If you read my last post, you'll know that there was a chance that we'd have to start over on our home study. In an attempt to remain positive, I kept telling myself there was no way that they would ask us to start over again after we just gotten things moving. I spoke with our case worker from the ICPC office and sure enough, we are starting from scratch.

For whatever reason, the Clark County ICPC office needs to complete the home study, as opposed to allowing our agency to simply share their report. Unfortunately, this means that all of our work over the past five weeks is for nothing. Even our fingerprinting will have to be done again.

It would be very easy to get angry and throw myself a pity party. Actually, I really wanted to do that. In my head, I have a hundred reasons to say "poor me." Some may even agree that I have just cause to respond based on my emotions. What I have to remember is anger and self-pity will not change our circumstances. Throwing a fit or allowing myself to fall into a depression will not get our home study done. We have decided to just move forward and do what is necessary to bring Alex home. From the beginning, we've told people that we would do anything to bring him into our family. Well, this is our chance to prove that. Don't get me wrong; I am frustrated by how things have gone. I have just resolved to handle it differently than I've handled some things in the past.

I firmly believe that God is at work in this. While that may sound cheesy or cliche, I really hope you can hear (or read) the sincerity behind it. One day, I hope to look back and recognize exactly why things happened this way. We had frustrations in our journey to adopt CJ, and now we understand why certain things happened. Had we moved any faster or slower, we may not have been matched with Brooke. In the grand scheme of things, an extra couple of weeks is just a small blip in our life story.

One silver lining is the cost. If this turns into an adoption, there will be very little cost to us. While we would pay almost anything to make this happen, it is awesome to think that we can use those funds to benefit our family in other ways.

This morning, I submitted our application to be a foster family. We're waiting to get an appointment for our fingerprinting (most likely this weekend). We'll need to take a training course and have them come to our house for a visit. Unfortunately, the class is full right now, so we're on the waiting list. Being that our case is a little unique, I'm hopeful that they will find a way to get us in. We have to complete this process in 60 days.

Your continued prayers are appreciated!